the truth about cats

i dunno man
the other day i
i thought i knew something
about cats
and how them nasty little critters
decide what they’re gonna do next
you know?

like here’s this little fuzzball dog
i’ve lived here in this house with
for six years
so am I gonna
rub up against it
rub my pheromones
or whatever
on it
like i love it
and want to mark it as mine

or instead maybe i’ll
whack it on the nose
with my claws out
and hiss at the poor little crapper
as it runs away whining

the other day i thought
i had it figured out because
i’d been watching this one cat
pretty much non-stop
for like three and a half weeks

but then i was petting it
and i know it was happy
i know it was, man
cause it was purring really loud
i mean really really loud
i’m absolutely sure this was
a happy cat

i’ve spent a lot of time with cats

but then it bit me
and now i’ve got
teeth holes
in my wrist
stupid damn cat

you can’t trust cats, man
you can’t trust cats

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